Tuesday, May 29, 2007

Short note

Just a short note what happened this weekend and yesterday ...

Nothing of interest though!

We just spent the days at Point Pleasant and had to be back on Memorial Day again as PPTH does not know that day. So we had to work nonetheless and therefore someone wasn't in a pleased mood, if you know what I mean.

PP was wonderful though ... just packed with a lot of talking, good meals, some walks, some very private moments and some more private moments.

As you can see ... nothing of interest though.

Have a good week - mine looks packed with work. Don't know when I will be able to write ...

Monday, May 28, 2007


It is not very easy sometimes when you have a "gemini" person as a friend, familiy member or even as a husband ...

Did you know that they are impatient and can be a pain in the neck? CURIOUS ...

Heck, I mentioned that I have something else than a Harley as a birthday present for him (for sure - as he own his motorbike) ... and now - he asks me all the time if it is his birthday now.

I dont like horoscopes as they never seem to fit perfect (they are so overall) ...but let me just show you some parts:

  • Geminis are quite high-strung and tend to spread themselves very thin
  • The have an incredible breadth of knowledge and are able to talk to almost anyone about many differing views
  • They have a wonderful love of the written word, as well as the spoken, and will often find themselves putting pen to paper and doodling their thoughts, if only to give them an insight into their own thinking processes. Many journalists, writers, and other advisers are born under the sign of Gemini; their forte with words makes a lasting impression.
  • The third sign of Gemini also relates to travels and short journeys. Gemini persons find themselves restless on many occasions and their itchy feet will cause themto travel frequently. These journeys may not always be long, but they are always on the go.
  • They are fascinated by the way the human mind works and the way people interact generally.
  • They can’t handle close-mindedness of any sort. With their inquisitive and restless mind they have an eclectic taste, having dabbled in many different viewpoints and topics.

So this is just a bit about the Gemini!

Interesting isn't it?! Of course the ascendent has to be regarded as well - as it has a big influence on how you are.

Therefore you just need to know your hour of birth ...

Surprised that I know such things?!

Sunday, May 27, 2007

Poem: But true

What ordinary day I thought
until the very best of life it brought.

Some sparkling blueish eyes,
that made me smile all so bright.

My heart no longer is what it was before,
it wants true love now - or even more.

Will I find that love in you?
Will I ever see there a "me and you"?

My wish I tell the godness above,
and I ask for the real, the only true love.

A love that goes down deep, deep in ...
a love that only can make your soul win.

Win the battle against sorrow and unhappiness,
to regain joy and pure happiness.

So my thoughts wander back to you,
and to myself I think - he is the one ... he is but true.
(c) J.E. Wilson
This poem was written on 1st January 2001 ... a very important date for me ... somehow.
Careful readers might know why.


If you have read Greg's blog you did probably see his lovely poem ... here is my answer on it:

And with your words of love you touched my soul
and all my trembling reality became whole...
The unsurety I once felt oh so true...
that made me stumble from time to time and feel blue...
that unsurety now is gone,
because I now know - you are the one!
(c) J.E. Wilson

Friday, May 25, 2007

All that I have

I just sat there at the kitchen table in the dark apartment and stared on the silhoutte of my hand holding a pen.

It was Monday late evening and I still had no clue where Gregory was. Pen ink crossed out the next row on my list and a sigh slipped out of my mouth.
“A lot more hotels left” I sighed and threw the pen across the room.
“Damn fuck!” I yelled and ruffled my hair.

I already called a bunch of hotels, after I did check every airport in the surrounding and every morgue, hospital etc. – no sign of Gregory.
The paper with the list of hotels upon was formed to a ball and followed the pen right across the room.

“I think I better go out and try the last hotels in person” I muttered to myself and stood up.
The whisky glass was put aside and the empty bottle of Aberlour was thrown away.
Believe me that I was no longer sober at that very evening, I already had some glasses over the eight but I really did not care … I did give a shit on in though.

Last look around in the empty and cold looking apartment and I closed the door behind me.
“Where now?” I asked myself silently and put the hands in my pockets.
My feet started to move and my mind just followed a bit later. I was not really surprised when I found me walking on the university campus and staring into the darkness of the night a few minutes later.

I even must have bought a tiny bottle of whisky in the shop around the corner as the typical brown paper stuck out of my jacket pocket and when I looked inside, the brownish golden liquid winked at me.

All windows of the Nassau Hall were dark and stared at me like foes in the night. I passed the building and made my way to the “Fountain of Freedom“, where I took seat at the rim.
My eyes were fixed on the water that sparkled like diamonds in the moon light ... but its beauty didn’t reach my soul, as my soul was far away searching Gregory’s in that lonely night.

Like he must have felt it ... I heard steps behind me but did not turn.
„Jim?“ I heard Gregory’s silent whisper some feet away.
Slowly I turned around and stared at the shadowly figure standing near the next building.
I tumbled to my feet and whispered a nearly voiceless “Greg?”

The person stepped back a bit and now I did see that it was Gregory.
“Don’t let him go” I thought and approached him.
A few steps away I stopped and looked at him.
He looked awful and deep in thoughts and the earphones of his I-Pod hung down his leather jacket.
“Hi” I susurrated and gave him a questioning look.
“Hi” Greg mumbled back and thumped his cane on the ground.

“Where have you been? I called nearly every hotel in town and I was worried like hell!”
Gregory blue eyes showed me that those words had been exactly the wrong ones.
He raised an eyebrow and answered coldly.
“Worried? Huh?”
I gulped down the lump in my throat and with a softer voice I continued.
“Greg … I … GOD! I mean I know that you got that email … but …”
“BUT? Is there a but?! I don’t think you should dare continuing!” Gregory barked at me and turned around.

I stepped forward and grabbed his arm, Greg swung around and next thing happened, I found myself on the ground holding my chin and licking away the droplets of blood.
“I am NOT Susan, Bonnie or Julie! You think you can go scot-free? You thought wrong! I will not allow you cheating on me. Do you get that NOW?” Gregory barked and stared me in the eyes.
Stunned at first I just stared at him and then shook my head.

“Gregory …”
“I don’t want to hear any lame excuses now!” he snapped back and was about to turn again.
“You will not leave me like that” I yelled at him and stumbled to me feet again.
“Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t just do that?” he answered silently and looked over his shoulder.

A deep sigh emerged from deep within my body and I ran with my fingers through my hair.
“Because you are all that I have!”
Slowly like in a slow motion sequence Gregory turned around and his blue eyes were fixed on me.
“Repeat that!” he said with a blank voice.
“You are all that I have, Gregory!” I said … paused and continued, “See I did not betray you and this is just the truth. Look me in the eyes and try to see the truth in there. You know me by heart! You would just see if I would lie to you!”

Greg now turned around completely and came closer.
"Go ahead! And be sure, I'll see if you lie!"
I just nodded and returned his straight look.

"It might sound a bit weird, but my computer account was broken and some hacker just misused all the information on it, including my messanger and my e-mail accounts."

Greg snorted and frowned but before he could interrupt me I carried on telling what happened to me.
My report was sometimes interrupted by a snort, a curse and some deep sighs.

"When that computer guy told me that this faked conversation was sent to you ... I raced home as fast as I could, but you were already gone."

Gregory sighed and looked at me.
"For sure I was gone, I just packed a few things, took my bike and got me a hotel room" he grumbled then.
I had to swallow down hard before I managed to ask him, if he'd be coming home again.

"Jim, I ..."
"You still don't believe me, right?" I spoke under breath and let me sink down on the stairs.
My eyes were fixed on the pavement and I felt my stomach turning when I heard Gregs steps.

Although I did rather expect him leaving now without a word, he approached me and with a gently touch of his fingers he made me look up again.
We exchanged glances and after some seconds he murmured silently, "Stand up".
I arose and must have looked more than unsure until a little smile enlightened his eyes.

"I believe you, Jim" Greg sighed and caressed my cheek with his soft fingers.
"I should have asked you immediately, but I was so hurt and ..." with a gentle kiss I sealed his lips and we held each other like drowning people.

The kiss was deepened and our breaths became harder after a while. Greg's gentle embrace turned into demanding touches and my hands wandered over his body.

"Hotel is close" Greg moaned between the kisses and to underline his meaning, he let his hand slip into my trousers.
I couldn't avoid groaning aloud before I was able to reply with a hoarse voice, "Let's go then!"

Without breaking stride we walked from the campus and two corners later we entered the hotel and went straight to the room.

Gregory opened the door "Go ahead!" he murmured and I entered the room.
The door was closed behind me with a silent click and I could hear Greg locking it afterwards.

I took my jacket off and placed it on the lonely chair. A clonk let me look down on the floor and I saw the whisky bottle rolling to and fro.
Before I was able to pick it up, Greg bent down and raised it.

"I already wondered if you took a bath in some malt barrel. How much glasses did you have?" he asked and gave me an inquiring look.
"Enough!" I said and winked at him.
"I see that in your eyes. Heck, man you are drunk!"
"Tipsy!" I replied and slowly unbuttoned my shirt.

"Your pupils are dilated as well, Greg ..." I said when he came closer to brush the shirt over my shoulders.
"No wonder" he murmured into my ear and kissed my neckline.

"How much?" I sighed when he unbuckled my belt and got rid of my trousers then.
"Too much for your taste ..." Greg voiced under his breath when he touched my back with feather-like touches.

His hands grabbed my hair to pull back my head.
"But not enough to be unable to do what I will do now" Gregory moaned and his teeth delved into my weak flesh.

With a simultaneous moan we sank onto the bed and soon were both undressed and entangled up in each other.

Heat and passion filled the air of the hotel room and the only words spoken for a long time were words of love and lust.

It must have been around 3 am though when Gregory turned on his stomach lazily and gave me a warm smile.

"So ... I am all that you have?" he asked me while caressing my chest with soft and tender touches.
"Mhm ..." I answered, turned and looked him deep in the eyes.

"You are all that I have ... and all that I want!" I said clearly.
Gregory's smile broadened and his eyes sparkled like opals in the glistening sun.
He leaned over me and pushed me into the linen and before he bent down his head to kiss me, he moaned into my ear, "And you are all that I want now".

Poem: Believe me

This poem was written by me quite a while ago though ... I know it is not one of my best ones - but nonetheless it was written from deep within.

Perhaps you get the meaning ...

I am close to tears and I don’t know why,
if I would give in – I would cry and cry and cry.

Why does love hurt so true,
why does love make us feel so blue?

Why am I asking me again and again ...
could you be really my man?

Did I just dream a time ago?
Was it just a freaky show?

My feelings for you – they are just but true!
Believe me – as I believe in you!

Monday, May 21, 2007


I am about to die! I think I am really about to die!

How can it be? Why is it always me?

Let me tell you what happened today ... on that bloody Monday. For sure it was a Monday as only such things can happen on mondays.

Everything was fine in the early morning hours. Gregory and I enjoyed breakfast and had some cuddling before we went to work.

Work was fairly normal for a Monday morning ... no disasters, no too weird patients during clinic duty ...and this perhaps should have warned me though.

I had no time today to sneak in the Internet - except for the early morning hours when I uploaded the poems I've written. As you can see I was high above the clouds today and this feeling lasted until ...well until I was kicked out of heaven and thrown into the mud.

My day consisted of appointments and clinic duty and so I was very surprised when I managed to finish clinic duty a bit earlier than usual to spend the last hour of work with Gregory ... but he on the other hand was already gone.

At first no one did know where he was and it took me a while to find out that he did not hide at his usual places but was already gone at home. According to Cuddy ... apparently sick!
"He really looked like shit, Wilson!" Cuddy said to me and gave me a questioning look.
"Are you sure?" I murmured and frowned.
"I am pretty sure, Wilson. He could not have played that ... I really don't think that he is such a good actor!"

"Okay" I thought nodded at her and made my way back to the office.
My thoughts circled around the day and what could have happened.
"Perhaps a migraine attack ... or something was rotten in the cafeteria." I muttered to myself when I finally reached my office.

First thing I did was grabbing the handset and dialing our number ...

... ... ...

No response though.

"Probably sleeping" I thought and dialed his cell phone number right after.
No reply either ... also not on my beeper message.

I decided to try it a bit later again as he really could have been sleeping or just not hearing the calls.

No way I thought of that what really happened ...

Some minutes later I tried to open my email account ... and I failed.
Next try ended in the very same result ...

Access denied! You have entered the wrong password!

Heck! I do have that password since more than 5 years ... no way I could have entered the wrong password.

I tried it anew ... and after three wrong entries ... I got the message to contact the administrator.

Administrator ... ha!
"Fine, fine" I sighed and dialed the number of the computer department in the hospital.
About 15 minutes later a young man was standing in the door frame.
"Dr. Wilson? I heard you have a problem?" he greeted me.
"Yes, I do have" I answered and explained to him what happened.

Another fast typings, clicks, swearing and about 20 minutes later, he leaned back in my chair, looked at me and said.
"Well, you had a hacker. It seems that someone just broke into your account."
"I beg you pardon?" I asked him with my jaws dropped.
One more click and we could see what was done ...

Oh yes ... I did see what was done - and my face color changed from normal to crimson and ghost white.
"Oh my holy godness!" I muttered and let me sink on the visitor's chair.
The young man looked at me and now he did grin slightly.
"Oh well... it was not you, right?"
"Of course it was NOT me!" I spat out.
"Heck! I am married and that ... Oh my GOD!"

A second later I thought someone just stabbed me with a knife right in my heart when he asked me, "Gregory House is who?"
"My husband, why?" I moaned and looked at him.
"Okaaaay... " he said and stood up.
"You should better try to reach him, it looks like that anonymous guy who broke into your account and apparently used your messanger for that ... little thing there ... did send that email to him."

My heart did stop beating and I was unable to answer or even to move when the computer guy patted my shoulder and went out of the room.

I must have sat there for more than half an hour or so...
Unable to move, unable to think and unable to do anything ...

My numbness vanished slowly and next thing I did was packing my things and rushing out of the hospital.

I am at home now ... he is gone ...

Some clothes are missing and there is no sign of him.

I am feeling so cold inside - so lonely and lost ... and my heart feels like being torn into pieces.

I didnt do nothing at all - and this is just the truth ...

This is how it must feel like when you are dying slowly and painfully.

Poetry: Words

I seem to be in a writer's mood today ...

Your invisible arms embrace me in my dreams,
your body I feel next to mine although you are miles and miles away.

Soft touches on my skin,
like feathers floating in the summer breeze.

My breath becomes harder ...
My stomach twists ...

You are with me in my dreams ...
You are here when I sit and think ... think of you ...

And my lips are longing for the sweetness of your kiss ...
And my body is longing for the tenderness of your touch ...
And my soul is longing for you ... as you resemble me so much.

Oh my love – my angel ... my sun,
you are the light ... you are the one.

The one I dreamt of so many times,
The one I longed for so many years,
The one I am looking for behind my fears.

You are with me in my dreams ...
You are here when I sit and think ... think of you ...

You might feel my invisible touches,
you might feel my ghost-like kisses,
you might just see me sitting here ... and smiling in my dreams ...

And my lips are longing for the sweetness of your kiss ...
And my body is longing for the tenderness of your touch ...
And my soul is longing for you ... as you resemble me so much.

Let us meet in the wonderland,
Let us meet where I can understand ...
Understand every gesture and every word ...
Let us meet – in the real life ... in our world!

copyright: J.E. Wilson
I did choose the title ... because those are just words. Words I had to bring on paper though ... as I already said ...writer's mood today!

Poetry: Is it real?

Your eyes are embedded in my heart,
the sound of your voice is the blood rushing through my veins.
When I feel the soft touches of your finger tips upon my skin like ghostly kisses ...
I close my eyes and a smile appears on my face.
And if you stumble I will catch you,
and if you fall I will help you up,
if you hestitate I will be standing there patiently ... waiting for you.
'Cause you are worth it all,
you are worth all the pain, all the vain and all the longing...
You are the air I breathe,
You are the light that brightens up my inner darkness ...
You are my little angel and you catch me when I stumble,
You help me up when I fall,
and when I hestitate you are the one standing there patiently ... waiting for me.
Am I worth it all?
All the pain? All the vain and all the longing?
Just give me no answer with words ...
show me what you want ... show me how you feel ...
show me that it is not a mere dream - show me it is real!
copyright: J.E. Wilson
It is very open ... I know ... perhaps you like it.

Spoken words: Dreams

Sometimes I just close my eyes and dream me away ...

Away over mountains, valleys and oceans I fly ... my wings are spread out and so I fly and fly and fly.

From high above I see the world rushing by and I think that everything might be so wonderful upon this earth if everyone cared ... if everyone cared!

So I carry on travelling and slowly my soul tears me into another direction - the place where you are ...

My feet reach the ground again and I stumble ... stumble into your waiting arms.

Eye meets eye, soul meets soul and our hands entangle ...

Your strong arms embrace me and I feel at home ...finally at home again.

Together we dance to that slow and lovely music only we hear. Our bodies melted together - skin to skin we sink deeper and deeper into the land of hopes and dreams.

We share the very intimate moments and we just sit and stare upon a lake only we can see here.

So I sit ... I sit ... and my eyes flatter ... and still I sit ... sit alone in my empty room and a smile enlightens my face - because I know that everything might be possible, if we only trust and believe in ourselves.

Everything might be possible if only we let it happen and my head drops back and I stare into the sky ...

I lift up my hands for a silent prayer ... and when my soul reaches out for you again - I now know everything can happen and nothing will be in vain.

Copyright: J.E. Wilson
Just some words ...

Saturday, May 19, 2007

Sorrow ...

Gregory has already stated in his blog what happened though when he found his pictures on my blog.

I really felt so sorry - but let me start at the beginning though.

The sorrow happened on Wednesday this week and I just thought it might be funny to show those pics here as I really think that he is looking way too cute again on those pictures ... but it should turn out to a little disaster for me though.

Gregory normally takes such things easy and most of the time we are laughing our asses off when we find some old pictures - so I thought he might just take it as it was intended - as a joke.

Far from that he took it as you know ... and he reacted in a way I never thought he would do. He was pissed off!

Gregory did not respond to any comment I made afterwards and I really tried it that way...
Nothing happened though and so I found myself walking down the hallway to his office.
I knocked at the office door and entered the room.
"Greg...I'm sorry. I did not know that you would mope...."
He just glared at me and did not respond.

"Greg..." I started anew and waited for a sign of recognition ...nothing.
He just turned to the file on his desk again and flipped through it.

"Greg...please..." I said silently and looked at him.
With a sigh Gregory scribbled something down and refused to look at me.

For a second I thought about approaching him and kissing his brain out so he would no longer be able to be pissed off ... but that really annoyed sigh just made me step back and close the door silently.

The next two hours I spent with thinking about how I could make up for it and why he was so pissed off this time. He normally knows me and we are not that pigheaded when it comes to old pictures and such stuff. That is why I really did not know what to do ...

I went to his office somewhat later that day and found it abandoned. No Gregory House was there ... bag was gone and Cameron just told me that House has left the PPTH approximately half an hour ago.

"Fine" I thought and made my way back to the office where a patient of mine was already waiting.
She has terminal cancer and she asked me if I would accept her invitation for dinner though.
I did accept the invitation and she invited me for dinner in a cozy Indian restaurant near the university.

"You should try the curry, Dr. Wilson" she said with a smile and pointed at the chicken curry in the menu.
I gave her a warm look and just smirked a bit.
"I don't think it would be wise to eat curry now, Hannah. I can't stand it though and you might not want me sitting here with a pale face and then speeding out of the room though, or?"
She just grinned and patted my hand.
"No, I think one person with a pale face is enough on that table, Dr. Wilson."

We really had a pleasant time and we spent nearly two hours in that restaurant until I drove her back home where her husband already awaited her.
It is never easy to let a patient go ... and sometimes it is really hard to stay cool and just be the doctor - especially when the patient is a wonderful person with a warm heart and soul.

After I brought her home I turned the car and headed towards our apartment.
My thoughts wandered back to Gregory and how pissed off he was when I did see him a few hours before.
He did not respond on my text messages nor did he pick up the phone when I tried to call him.

My right hand turned on the radio and a second later I stared at it when I heard a really weird sound coming out of the loudspeaker.
"What the heck?" I muttered as I listened to that typically Indian sound.
With a mood that really sucked I thumped my fingers on the steering wheel while I was standing at the stoplight in the city center.

The driver's window was slightly opened and I did not recognize a man approaching my car until I heard the knock at the window.
My heart nearly stopped beating when I became aware that a man was standing there - staring at me.

It was an Indian and he smiled at me.
"Okay" I thought "a mass murder doesn't look like this" and so I opened the window to ask him what he wants.

The music stopped howling and the smile of the man became even broader when he heard the last tunes of this "song".
"May I help you?" I asked him and gave him a hint of a smile, hidden behind a questioning look.
Suddenly I found myself staring at a bunch of red roses that blocked the complete window now.
Behind this bunch I heard the mumbling voice asking me:
"Wanna buy some rrroses?"
"I ..."
"Putifullll rrroses! For you I'll make a special offerrr!"
"I beg ..."
"Buy one 3 bucks! Buy ten 25 bucks! And buy the whole bunch ... just 50 bucks for you!"
Again I wanted to tell him that I am not interested and then I stared at those wonderful and really beautiful red roses (I have to admit) and next thing I know is that I was 50 bucks worse off and had a bunch of about 50 red roses lying next to me.

"Why not ..." I sighed to myself and a few minutes later I parked the car in front of the house.

It was aroound 8 pm when I opened the door. There was light in the living room and I heard that the TV was on.
I placed my bag in the corner and hung up my jacket. My stomach twitched a bit and I took one or two deep breaths before I entered the living room with the bunch of roses.
Gregory was sitting on the sofa and staring at the screen.
I swallowed hard down, greeted him with a "Hey, darling..." and approached him then.
Greg on the other hand just gave me a short - apparently annoyed - look and turned away again.

My husband just did not show any sign of response and I began anew.
"Hun, I..." - as there was no response and just a blank looking Gregory - soon silence filled the room.

I stood there like someone waiting to be picked up ...
A deep sigh later and with a lump in the throat I decided to go into the kitchen and water the flowers.

While I was standing in the kitchen and arranging the roses in the vase, Gregory arose and walked towards the bedroom.
I followed him with my eyes and so I did look at him when he gave me a glance over his shoulder and gnarled a, "There's no dinner for you".

According to Greogry's report I must have looked slightly uncomfortable when I told him that I already had dinner though.
He would have known that if he would have picked up my phone or would have answered my text messages. Of course I know now that his cell was switched off ... but at that time I just thought that he must have read the messages.

Gregory raised an eyebrow. "Oh, really..."
I blushed slightly as his reaction just showed me that he had no clue I was invited by a patient.
"Yes...um...you were gone and...and...a patient invited me to that restaurant..."
"A patient!" he muttered and eyeballed me.

"Yes...um...she wanted to thank me..."
"Nice", he nodded and next thing I did see was a slammed door.

I rushed to the bedroom door and opened it.
"Greg, there was nothing..."
"Out of here", he said very silently and grabbed the book on his nightstand.
"But I..."
"OUT!" Greg yelled and his eyes looked blank.
I had to swallow down the lump in my throat again and after I examined his face for any sign of forgiveness ... and I couldn't find some ... I just withdrew my head and closed the door.

So I stood there - again staring at a closed door with Gregory in the room behind.
Another sigh slipped out of my mouth and I rubbed my neck.
"Damn it!" I thought and my feet just led me into the sitting room and I grabbed the bottle of Laphroaig, opened it and poured me a single malt.

The lights were already dimmed and I just turned out the TV and switched on the hifi.
The music of The Spencer Davis Group filled the air and I downed my first glass of malt to the sound of "Gimme some lovin'".

My thoughts went astray and I thought about how stupid I have been ... again.
I poured me another malt ... and another ... and another ...

I did lay on the sofa, listening to very special music and staring at the ceiling.
A good time later I stumbled to my feet and went to the bedroom door.
The wood was staring at me like a guard standing at a gate and asking for the parole.
I breathed in and out, supported my arms on the door frame and asked a silent "Greg? Babes?".
The voice behind the door answered with a grunted "Leave me alone".
I opened the door a bit as I did not want to give in that easy.

"Greg...bunnybum...I'm sorry....I did not mean to piss you off..."
Gregory did not lift up his head and just looked into the book he was holding in his hands.

My feet led me into the room and I managed to stop them after three steps done.
"Hunny? I...I...just thought those pictures were funny...and...and...you really look cute on them..."
His response was a snort and a nod towards the door.

I just felt somehow numb by then and so I just gave in, sighed and closed the door silently.

Tired legs led me into the living room again and I stood there, my eyes fixed on the red roses and the candle light and next thing I did was smashing my hand against the wooden bookshelf and yelling a "JERK".
I was so upset of myself that this was the very first reaction that came out.

A split of a second later I heard Gregory yelling.
"Oh no" I thought and the palm of my hand hit my forehead. "Dammit! I did not mean you, Greg!"

"Yeah, for suuuuuure!" was his reply and it was crystal clear that he did not believe it.

I sank down on the sofa again and the Laphroaig bottle caught my eyes again.
Another drink and a secret cigarette on the balcony later I found my guts again to return to the hall of the mountain king.

My hand turned the doorknob and I tiptoed into the bedroom.
"What are you doing here?" Gregory said and frowned.
"Um..." I swallowed. "Going to bed?"
"No way", Gregory gnarled and in the dimmed light I saw him shaking his head.
He rummaged around in bed and two seconds later I had my yammies thrown at me and was told with a cold voice to sleep on the couch.

"Out!" he barked and really thought that this couldn't be true now.
I really was taken aback and my "Gregory!" sounded more than perplexedly.
He on the other hand just flashed at me and it was the look in his eyes that made me slowly step backwards out of the room and into the dark hallway again.

"Fine" I thought and muttering to myself I went into the sitting room - again.
I changed my clothes and tried to make myself comfortable on the couch.
For sure it was not the first time I had to spend on a sofa ... but this time it was because of some pictures!
Just some silly pictures and I was laying on that sofa like I had done something really really bad.

Gnawing on my lower lip I tried to analyze what happened though ... but with a few single malts in my body I really wasn't able to think properly.
I tiptoed into the kitchen and poured me a glass of milk, walked back to the sofa and started thinking ...

A few hours, one or maybe two single malts later I grabbed the candle and single rose and made my way into the bedroom again.

I opened the door silently and tiptoed to my nightstand where I carefully placed the candle. I walked to Gregory's side then and I knelt down.
"Greg...", I whispered and looked into his beautiful face.
Gregory mumbled a sleepy "Mmmmh?" and my heart slopped over.
I placed the rose gently upon his pillow and then I bent forward to kiss his forehead.
"I'm sorry", I whispered and I had to swallow down again when Gregory opened his eyes and I found myself drowning in his astonishing blue eyes all over sudden.

My lips wandered from his forehead down his cheek until I finally felt the softness of his lips.
"Greg...", I heard myself moaning and when he returned my kiss and wrapped his arms around me my legs turned to jelly and if I wouldn't have been kneeling I would probably have just lost the ability to stand upright.

How can it be possible to miss someone like that - although that someone is just around all the time, how?
I don't know it - but I do know that I missed him like hell and that feeling sorrow and numb is a feeling I don't want to have that often when he is around.

I deepend that kiss of love and my hands wandered over his body. Thousand kisses or more I placed upon each piece of skin when I unbuttoned his yammy shirt and I heard myself whispering sweet names into his ear.

"You're so beautiful...", I murmured into his ear and while caressing his bare chest I told him anew that I felt so sorry ...
"I'm good...I'm not angry..." Gregory panted silently and his eyes just made me come closer and closer and soon our bodies melted to one.

My soul screamed out his name - or was it me screaming it? - and I just drowned in his love and arms ... and the journey throught he valley of making it up just started - and it was a long journey and a short night...


For those interested what kind of Indian music it was - I found it on youtube:

Friday, May 18, 2007

Nicholas Nickleby

For Gregory ... he doesn't know that movie - have a look!

Only a few people I know really know this movie.

I don't understand why because the storyline is just excellent and also the actors do a great job in here.

Nicholas Nickleby is performed so very well ... it is a stunning movie with a lot of true speaking in it.

By the way for those not knowing ... "Nicholas Nickleby" was written by Charles Dickens!

To give you a summary:

Nicholas Nickleby is one of Dickens’ earliest works, is in the episodic and melodramatic style familiar from The Pickwick Papers, and was published serially 1838-9. It is the story of the Nicklebys (Nicholas, his mother and sister Kate) who have been left penniless by the death of Mr Nickleby. In their poverty and desperation they seek help from Nicholas’s uncle - the difficult and oppressive Ralph Nickleby who is a usurer. Nicholas immediately bothers his uncle due to his independent attitudes and is sent to Dotheboys Hall to teach. He witnesses the mistreatment of orphans there by Wackford Squeers. Disgusted by this and particularly the treatment of Smike, Nicholas thrashes the evil Squeers and escapes with the lad Smike who becomes his close comrade. Nicholas continues on his mission to end ill-treatment. He saves Kate from Sir Mulberry Hawk’s insults and makes a home for the family. Ralph gets his comeuppance eventually despite his continued evil and although Smike dies of consumption, there is a general sense of justice at the novel’s close.

My advice ...go and read the novel or - go and get this movie and watch it!

The actors deserve it - it is a job more than well done!

Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Risking murder ...

Well ... I suppose I risk now murder or having to sleep on the sofa - but, sorry Greg, I really couldn't resist after you teased me with that eyebrow wash!

Enjoy - Gregory and his theatre troup:

Oh ... hmmm... right ... auntie!


Someone ever talked about a "fag"?

The blonde in the middle ... well ...no comment!

I really just couldn't resist ...

When life just blows ...

That was in an email I got from a colleague ... just had to share it!

Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Do not disturb - Part II

The elevator door opened with a ping sound and Gregory entered it.
"Come in ... we don't have every time in the world!" he moaned and thumped his cane on the ground again.
I raised an eyebrow and stepped in as well.
"What is going on here, Greg?! This is a four star hotel at Broadway ... so could you just explain me why the heck you booked a room?"
"I didn't book it in advance" Gregory replied and pushed the floor button again.
"You already did push it!" I answered and gave him a side glance.

"I know that! But it is too slow..." he said and played with the key card in his hand.
"Heck, Gregory what is going on here? You can't ..."
"Aaaw, shut up for now, Jim! I will soon tell you, okaaaaaay?"
"You just can't ..." I started and was interrupted by the ping of the elevator and Gregory pushing me out of the very same.

A short look upon the card and he gestured to the left side.
"This way!" Greg grunted and moved on.
I lifted my arms for a second and made a silent prayer ...
"Can't you just tell me ..."
"Can't you just shut up?" Greg grunted back and stopped in front of the room we had.
"Ha! That's it ... 515" he spoke to himself and opened the door.
"After you, gentleman!" Gregory said and bowed slightly.

A sigh slipped out of my mouth and I gave him another side glance while passing him by.
Gregory must have thought I was too slowly as he just pushed me in the room, fumbled at the door and then closed it.
"In there!" he moaned and gestured with his cane towards the room.
"I ..." with that I started but was not able to continue as Gregory just pushed me forward and I tumbled my way to the bed.
"GREGORY!" I exclaimed and then looked at him with a slightly annoyed expression.

"You wanna know what is going on?" Gregory asked then and looked at me with narrow eyes.
"Yes! I want to know that!" I replied and put the hands on my hips.
"Fine, I will show you" he said silently and approached me.
Next thing I felt was my right hand being grabbed and guided to his delicate body part.
A gasp slipped out of my mouth when I found out that the blood circulation was doing pretty well.
"Oooh..." I whispered and then this OH turned into a "Heeeey" when I was pushed on the bed.

I was lying on the bed staring in disbelief at Gregory who threw his backpack and jacket in the corner of the room and opened his shirt feverishly.
My mouth became dry as a desert and I had to swallow down hard when he unbuckled his belt.
"What are you waiting for?" Gregory moaned and gestured at me.
"Undress or I can't promise your clothes will survive that!"
I folded my arms before my chest and raised an eyebrow.

"I will not obey!" I replied and looked at him.
"I beg you pardon?" he said and stepped out of his trousers.
Trying to stay calm I gave him a stern look and repeated what I just did say.
"Oh... you will not obey though? Well ..." Greg paused and touched his chin like he would be thinking. Then he approached me, popped a Vicodin and put the bottle aside ... and next thing he did was making me too weak to resist, so I found myself lying on the bed with a torn shirt and with my husband kneeling above me.

"I don't give a shit, if you will obey or not!" Greg moaned and sucked at my neck.
A deep moan slipped out of my mouth and my fingernails scratched over his back.
"You don't know how you looked at me in that coffee shop" Greg carried on and his tongue tip teased my nipples.
Clutching the linens and arching slightly I was unable to reply though.
"Did you think that I did enjoy that cake so much? Jerk! I wanted you all the fucking time!" he whispered hoarsley into my ear and parted my legs with his knee.

"Greg" I sighed and my surely dilated pupils tried to focus on him.
He had his mouth slightly open and was panting a bit.
"Jim" he whispered and slowly did make us become one.
My head dropped back and a little cry slipped out of my mouth when he started to move slow and demanding.

His mouth found mine and he parted my lips with the tip of his tongue.
I sighed inwardly and embraced him with my legs to push him even deeper.
"GAAAAAAAAAWD JIM!" Gregory cried out and I moaned out at the very sight of him.
Gregory began to thrust harder and deeper and we both got lost in the feeling of lust and sin for a long long time this afternoon.

We enjoyed the bed, the desk, the floor and the bathroom and we can say that the whipped cream in the hotel is excellent though.
Especially when placed on some delicated body parts ...

The "Do not disturb" sign wasn't turned until we left in the late Sunday morning hours.

By the way ... we still have that sign as it mysteriously did find its way into Greg's backpack and so into our apartment.

Do not disturb - Part I

The dessert of yesterday reminded me of another happening some months ago and I think now might just be the time to tell you.

I am now talking about the hot chocolate fudge cake with whipped cream Gregory had for dessert yesterday and not about the other kind of dessert I just mentioned on the brink.

“May I have a fudge, please” Gregory asked me after lunch and gave me that puppy dog glance again.
“Oh c’mon, Greg, stop pouting. You know that I can’t resist you doing that!” I answered him with a wink and waved at the waitress at the same time.
A few minutes later Gregory got his fudge cake and looked at it with sparkling blue eyes.
The fork delved into the brown mass and then found its way to an expecting mouth.

Believe me, Gregory can celebrate eating a fudge cake and his noises are sometimes a bit embarrassing for all the other people in the surrounding.
“Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh, hrrrrrmmmmmmmm” was his response when he felt the cake on his tongue and my response was to lean back and watch him meticulously.

Have you ever watched “Harry and Sally”?
Yes? … Fine, you might have the right imagination then of Gregory eating a chocolate fudge cake.
My heart started to beat faster and his little noises made another part of my body respond, so that I made sure no one could see what was going on with me.
My facial expression was blank and I just rolled my eyes towards the ceiling.

Gregory gave me a side glance and smirked a bit.
This little devil perfectly knows what he causes with that behavior.
He leaned back and stopped eating for a while.
“Are you okay, James?” he asked me and used the napkin like an old English lady.
I couldn’t avoid a grin though and just nodded at him.
“I just asked me the very same, because I don’t want you to have a multiple orgasm here, you know.”
“Not here, hmmm?” he muttered silently and gestured at me to come closer.
“Hmmm?” I asked and bent forward.

I hadn’t noticed that his left hand was not to be seen anymore and it took me a lot not to moan out loud when I felt his fingers caressing my delicate part for a tiny bit of a second.
“Interesting” I said and straightened up again.
Gregory nodded and continued eating his cake but this time without those little noises. He just kept my glance and licked the fork from time to time.

“You know” I said when rubbing my neck, “this reminds me of a nice little episode we had some months ago in New York, when we had to book a hotel room all of a sudden as someone was behaving like that…”
The fork froze in mid-air and Greg’s pupils widened … then after that hint of second he guided the fork into his mouth and swallowed the sweet mass down.
“Mhmmmm, I know exactly what you mean and the whipped cream was priceless though” he spoke silently and licked some cream from his left index finger.

I think I should tell you know what happened in New York in March. To be exactly it was right after my birthday …

We drove to New York as my sister has sent me a Rothmans gift card as a birthday present. Therefore we went to Rothman's Union Square, 200 Park Avenue South. After a few hours of shopping – we spent hours at Tower records though – we decided to have a coffee break in a nice and cozy coffee shop nearby.

„Oh, look Jim they have fudge cake“ Gregory said with a broad grin and I just nodded and studied the menu.
„I did recognize, Greg“ I murmured and decided to have a cheese cake and a latte.
Greg ordered his fudge and a latte as well.

I don’t have to explain you what happened then, if you have read the above mentioned carefully.
“Gregory “ I sighed silently and leaned forward.
Greg just looked at me and a smile appeared on his face.
“Jimmy?” he asked me and raised an eyebrow.
“Greg, if you don’t stop the moaning and sighing will licking your fudge and celebrating the taste of it like that …then …”
“What will happen then, Dr. Wilson?” he purred and took another mouthful.

My hand slipped under the table and my fingers caressed his crotch.
Greg chocked on the fudge and coughed aloud.
“Then I will just not be able to stop that and I cannot guarantee that we won’t be landing in jail though.” I murmured into his ear.
Gregory nodded and took a sip of water.
“Check, please!” he exclaimed then and we both leaned back.

I frowned and looked at him questioningly.
“What are you up to now?” I asked him when he had paid.
“We go!” he said gruffly and grabbed his backpack.
I stood up and followed him on the street.
“Where the heck are you going?” I asked him and pointed at the entrance of the metro.
“We have to take this one to get back to our car!” I said and quickened my pace to catch up with him as he was limping towards the entrance of a hotel.

“Oh shut up for a second, James” Gregory barked and nodded at the doorman when he opened the door for us.
“But …” I tried to ask him what the heck we were doing in a hotel now.
Gregory on the other hand just reached the reception and I approached him.
“One room with a king size bed we can offer you, sir” the lady behind the reception said without looking up from her screen.
“That is great!” Gregory replied and gave her the credit card and everything she needed.

A few minutes later she handed him the key and looked at us with a smile and a nod.
“Enjoy your stay at our hotel” she said and we both nodded.
Gregory turned towards the elevators and I just followed him to speechless to ask a single thing.

I was just staring at him from time to time and he stood there thumping his cane on the marble floor…

To be continued!

Can you believe ...

that this is Gregory?

Found that picture yesterday evening - by accident - when cleaning the storeroom.

Isn't he cute?

I really like that picture ... - anyway, to be even I will show you another old pic of me when I was very very young though.

I actually found some interesting shots of Greg in some costumes ... he told me that he played in a troupe once.

Perhaps I could ...

Monday, May 14, 2007

On the way to the Chinese

I looked at Gregory when he stood up and limped around my desk.
„But there was something else, no?“ Gregory asked questioningly and approached me.
„Was there?“ I murmured into his ear.

„I thought you wanted to tell me something ... but then changed your mind“, Gregory said and tried to look me in the eyes.
„Hmmm...not really“ I whispered and played with his collar.
„Fine then ...“ Gregory answered with a slightly annoyed undertone and turned to the door.

„EY!“ I said and pinched his ass.
„OUCH! Are you insane? What was THAT for?“ he barked and turned his head.
Before he could reach the doorknob I pulled him closer and whispered.
„I just wanted to do that“ and with these words I kissed him gently.

Through the daze of love I heard Gregory purring and felt his warm embrace.
This reply made me deepen the kiss and I just got lost in the feeling of his heartbeat against my chest.
After a minute or two, I stepped back and murmured „Lunch now?“
Gregory opened one eye and looked at me „Lunch right“ he said and opened the second eye.
„Okay here we go!“ he said and cleared his throat.
I did likewise and gave him a side-glance.
„Cafeteria?“ I asked him with a smile.

„Chinese?“ he replied and eyeballed me.
„Hrrrmmm ... sounds good!“ I answered and swallowed down the lump in my throat.
Gregory beamed and opened the door.
„After you, gentleman!“
„Thank you“ I replied with a hint of a bow and stepped forward.

When passing by Gregory he pinched my ass and I muttered a „GOSH!“
Rubbing my bum I heard him chuckling his cute little ass off.
I turned my head towards him and raised an eyebrow.

„Wasn’t me“ Gregory answered and smiled at me as innocent as a young child.
„For sure not ...“ I grunted and shook my head when he just grinned and winked at me.
I was about to reply his silent answer when his look became blank and he wanted to pull me behind the pillar.
„Let’s hide behind the pillar for a second“ he hissed.
I looked around for Cuddy and asked him „Why?“ when I did not see her.

Greg pointed in the hallway „Tenacious M at 2 o’clock!“

„Oh ... hide then“ I said with a grin and walked towards the direction of Dr. Fornara (or like Greg says: Tenacious M!)
Gregory hid behind that pillar and I was aware that he just peeped around the corner.

A few steps away from our Italian dottore I greeted him with a friendly „Hello. Dr. Fornara!“
„Hello, Dr. Wilson“ he greeted me with his Italian dialect.
Dr. Fornara looked around and asked me then with a smile „Did you by chance see Dr. House?“
I rubbed my neck and replied with a „For sure“.
Dr. F beamed at me and looked around again.
„So ... where is he?“
„Is that of any interest for you?“ I asked him with narrowed eyes.

This foolish smile was still on his face when he told me that he just wanted to invite him for lunch.
I replied the smile „Did you? I thought you already did that last week?“
He beamed again (Greg is right: Dork!) „Oh ... did he tell you?“
„Yes ... he told me everything though“ I said with a nod.
„Bueno“ TenaciousM replied and his smile became even broader.
„You are good friends“ he then asked me and I just thought why not carrying on with this little play for a while.
„Yes, we are very close“ I replied with a nod at Mr. Italian.
„Actually I am having a lunch date with him now“ I continued and checked my watch like I would want to underline that sentence.
„Oh“ he answered with a rather disappointed look upon his face.

„Any problems with it?“ I asked Dr. F and gave him an enquiring look.
„No, for sure not. I will ask him instead, if he wants to go out for dinner with me though.
I cleared my throat and asked sweet as sugar, „Will you?“
Dottore Fornara nodded feverishly.

I patted Dr. F’s back and had to hold myself back not to use my fist.
„Well, good luck then. I heard he is not available though“ I spoke silently into his ear.
Italian guy blushed and stammered „Well...I ...oh ... I will ask him anyway.“

What a brainteaser, I thought.
„So you are ... interested?“ I replied with a forced smile.
„Io ... I ...“ he stammered again and looked around.
He then continued with a nod „Dottore House is a very good doctor, for sure I am interested in him as a colleague“. Dr. F then blushed slightly and coughed in his fist.

„For sure“ I nodded „I didn’t mean anything else“ (who believes that, huh?)
Looking on my fingernails I carried on „But as far as I know, I have him around every evening of this week ...“
Another „Oh“ emerged from Dr. F’s lips and he really looked disappointed.

Disappointment switched into a questioning look and he then asked me, „You have a case then?“
I rubbed my neck and did so if I was absorbed in some thoughts.
„You have a case? Or why do you see him every evening?“

„We love each other ...“
I cleared my throat and looked at Dr. F getting pale.
„s ... company“ I continued after the break of a second.

„I see“ Dr. F said and swallowed hard.
„So you are very close, right?“
I checked my watch again, looked up and straight into his eyes „Pretty much“ I replied.
Mr. Italy leaned forward a bit and whispered something into my ear.

I backed off and looked at him with an earnest expression.
„I think you should ask HIM that! I just know that he is wearing a ring,“ I said with a grumpy nod.

This little bugger!

Doctor Fornara replied with a „Grazie, Doctor Wilson!“ and wanted to shake hands.
I gave him mine to say goodbye though ...and he looked down on my fingers.
„You are wearing nearly the same ring though!“ Dr. F said and his pupils widened a bit.
Smiling at him I answered, „Do I? Funny!“

He nodded and then said with narrowed eyes, „Yours looks a bit different“.
It was me now looking down on my wedding ring.
„Really? Thought they are like twins ...“
„You bought the same rings then?“ he asked with a shrug and then exclaimed „That I call a friendship!“

I nodded „Yes, you might call it that ... for example.“
Now I was just about to tell him that Gregory and I are married – but was interrupted by Cuddy’s voice barking „WILSON!“
I turned around and nodded a „Hello, Cuddy“
„Did you see House?“ she asked me immediately after she has nodded at Dr. F.

Let’s play the dork, I thought and frowned while looking at her.
„Why should I?“
„Why should you?“ she asked me and gestured in the air, „Because you are living together and you know every little step he takes!“

Screaming out a „STRIKE“ inwardly I grinned at Cuddy.
„Not every though“ I said with a beam.
From the corner of my eye I did see Dr. Italy (this little ...) looking from one to another.
A weak „ You live together“ reached my ear then and Cuddy turned towards him.
„For sure they do,“ she sighed „they are married!“ she mumbled and pointed at me.

Oh believe me – I was so dancing inwardly!
Outwards I just checked my watch again while telling her that I don’t know where Gregory was.
Pointing at my watch I gave both a nod and apologized „Excuse me now, I am off for my lunch break!“
With these words I left them with a wave and a smile and just let Dr. F standing there like a cow in a thunderstorm.

I made my way out of the building and waited for Gregory at the large tree right in front of the entrance hall.
About two minutes later Gregory came out of the building and passed me by with a „That was PRICELESS!“
I grinned and walked along his side.
„Did you see his face?“ I asked Greg.
„Yessss! It nearly fell to the floor!“

We both chuckled and I nudged his shoulder.
„Cuddy did you a favor though!“
„Me?“ Greg replied and gave me a side-glance.
„Us?“ I asked with a wink.
Greg winked back at me and continued, „I really thought you would tell him.“
„I just was about to do so ...“ I said with a shrug.

„That would have been more priceless then!“ Greg said with a devilish grin.
„Perhaps“ I shrugged and placed my hand upon his shoulder.
„Hmmmm... will you pay now or shall we risk paying the check with the money you gave me?“
I rolled my eyes towards the sky and sighed.
„Feel invited!“
„Nice ...“ Greg murmured with a deeper voice.

We looked at each other and both knew that the dessert would be priceless!

Ready for Lunch?

My door opened without a notice of a knock...
„Hunny? Ready for lunch?“ Gregory asked and peeked in my office.
I looked up from my computer.
„Yes in a minute. I don't get that damn thing here right. Do you have any ideas?“ I pointed at my screen.

Gregory frowned, „What is the problem?“
„You know a bit of computer things, right?““Um...yes“ he answered and approached me.

I rubbed my neck. „See I wanted to write that email and it just does not work“
Greg studied my screen and waved me from the seat. „Let me check it out!“ he murmured and took seat when I stood up.
„Any ideas?“ I asked him after a while.
„Hmmmm. You did not give me time though“ Greg murmured and clicked on some buttons.

Just nodding I looked over his shoulder.
„Can’t you just relax? And by the way, this sentence sounds crap!“ Gregory erased that very sentence and wrote something anew.
„No, it sounds good!“

A sigh slipped out of my mouth.
„I had to read it over for a colleague though“ I replied.
Greg looked up with a grin.
„So not your crap?“
I shook my head and looked at him when he pushed the „send“ button.
„Away it is...“ he said and leaned back in my chair.

„Thanks a lot, Greg!“ I replied with a warm smile.
„Oh, by the way ... where did you get this money from?“ he asked and waved with the counterfeit note.
„Oh ... that“ I grinned „I dunno“.
Gregory raised an eyebrow.

„It was just here on my desk“ I answered and pointed at my desk.
„I already asked your ducklings“ I continued with a grin and then shrugged „but they don’t know nothing at all. Any idea?“

Greg gave me a tongue-in-cheek reply.
„If it was on my desk...I would have a faint idea, I think. But here? Hmmmm...Cuddy maybe?“
„Cuddy? Why should she?“ I replied with a questioning look.
He shrugged „Dunno?! Why should anyone?“

„Because it is fun?“ I grinned.
Greg pointed at me and narrowed his eyes, „It was YOU!“
With an innocent look I glanced back.
„Yes, YOU!“
I sniggered first and replied with a rather devilish smile, that I might have chosen a dog picture.
„A dog? Why the dickens???“
„A Chihuahua?“ I asked back.

Gregory snorted.
„Oh bugger ... nice ... you are sooo very kind!“ he said with a dry tone.
My answer was rather that of an eight year old now.

He rolled his eyes towards the ceiling.
„So ... it was NOT you?“
„What?“ I asked back.
„The moooooney“ he said and rolled his eyes again.
I rubbed my neck „Oh ... I had such a topic with Eric lately.“
„What kind of topic?“ Greg asked with twinkling eyes.

Slightly blushing I replied silently „That you are worth all the money in the world!“
His answer was a blush and a slightly dorky grin.
After a second or so he asked „When ... I mean ... when and why did you tell him that?“
I rested my hands on the desk and looked outside.
„Oh ... I met him in Chicago, didn’t I tell you that? He was there as well due to some business.“
„... No ...“
„Oh ... I suppose I had other things in my mind this weekend then“ I answered with a wink.
Gregory grinned, „I bet you had!“
„I hope you liked my little surprise?!“
„Mhm“ I said and felt a lump in my throat. I rearranged my tie and cleared my throat.

Greg brushed over his chin.
„You tend to fumble at your tie when you get horny.“
I immediately stopped rearranging my tie and combed through my hair.
He winked at me.
„And you do THAT when you want ME to get horny...“
„I ...“

I caught myself gnawing on my lower lip and clearing my throat again.
He really got it right at that time – but as we had no time and were in my office ... I just pushed it away. So I decided to stay cool when Greg asked me to spit it out.
„We’re alone! C’mon ... spit it out!“
„Nothing“ I said and fetched my wallet.
„Ready for lunch?“

Gregory sighed and nodded.„Yes ...“

Something weird

mood: pmsl

Monday ...

Monday means back at work, monday means weird happenings, monday means Greg is in an awful mood, monday means you may find rididculous things ...

Who would ever think about making money with your own conterfeit on it? Would you?

Imagine my surprise when I just came into my office and found that:

on my desk!

Not only one dollar notes - no the whole money through ...

I stood there gawking and found myself dialing Greg's office number.

"Hmmm?" he moaned into the handset.

"Come here, Greg, you have to see this!"

"What? Cuddy wearing an overall or why are you so nervous?" he grunted and I heard him rubbing his beard.

"Come here and you'll see!" I repeated and hang up.

Five minutes later he stood in the doorframe and nodded at me.

"So? Why did I have to hurry here?"

I checked the watch "You call this hurry?" I asked him and raised an eyebrow.

"Interesting, because when you really want something you can be really fast!" I said with a smirk.

"Haha, Mr. Funny Mood!" Gregory muttered and entered my room.

A sigh slipped out of my mouth and I poured him a mug of coffee.

"Take that, sip and when the coffein reached your wake up system I will show you something!" with these words I handed him the coffee.

"Hmmm..." was the only reply and a hand stretched out to grab the coffee.

Silence filled the room and was only disturbed by a moan when the coffee was sipped. He really is a sleepy head and needs his time to wake up. Especially on Monday mornings ...

About three to five minutes later Gregory cleared his throat and I looked up from the file I was working at.

"What kind of case is it though?" Gregory asked and looked slightly interested.

"This?" I answered and pointed at the file. "Oh, this is not why I called you. This is just ..."

He interrupted me with a wave "Tell me then I don't have all the time in the world!" he said over the rim of his mug.

"Don't you?" I replied and raised and eyebrow while leaning back in my chair.

Gregory sighed and placed the mug on the table.

"No! And today I am not in the mood for that kind of conversation. I had a damn fucking night ..." he barked and became aware what he said and stopped.

I on the other hand grinned my ass off and rubbed my chin.

"Had you? Well, that is interesting, because I can't remember we did such things. You turned and turned and played silkworm again..."

"Youuuuu" he pointed at me and could not avoid a slightest bit of a smile.

"Meeeeeeee" I pouted back and gave him a dollar note.

"Huh?" Gregory asked and looked blank.

"For your endeavors!" I said with a devilish grin.

"What the dickens?!" Gregory began to bark and stared on the note.

I stood up and approached him, smooched his cheek and patted his back.

"You deserve it. Buy a reubens sandwich or so ..."

"TEASE!" he snapped and nudged my shoulder.

Gregory then turned around and left my office with the ten bucks, of course.

He didn't call back yet - I am sure he did not see the face on the note though ...

Really looking forward what will happen when he wants to pay with that counterfeit note.

Saturday, May 12, 2007

On my way

mood: happy

I am already waiting at the airport and sitting in an Internet café here ... about to leave soon and just using the waiting period for checking emails and - obviously - writing a short message on my blog.

Finally the congress is over and I will soon be at home again!

I really missed Greg and I am happy to see him again in a few hours. Just a bit of a boring flight and then he will pick me up from the airport though.

So looking forward to this weekend I am.

He promised me a surprise and I hope it will be a nice one!

Really could do with some snuggling, cuddling and snogging ...

The congress was more or less interesting and some of the lectures were really good I have to admit.

Yesterday evening there was a dinner for all the participants and after that some of us went into a nice Irish pub near the hotel.

Did I tell you were I am? I think I just forgot to mention that I am in Chicago at the moment.

I will tell you more about it when I'll be at home and having some time to write.

Now I have to leave ... only a few minutes left!

Friday, May 11, 2007

Bored ... and Type A

Type A ... I dont mean the blood type now ;)

I was talking about a stupid personality test ... this is my result:

You Have a Type A Personality

User Submitted Image

You are ambitious, driven by your desire to get things done. Type A personalities are characterized by their drive and intense work ethic. You are competitive; you want respect, not affection. You may become irritated when you have to wait on a line or at a red light.
Are you a Type A or a Type B?

Bored I am because I am currently not at the PPTH, not in Plainsboro at all ...

Currently using the Internet access in the hotel room and my notebook - i.e. I am on tour!

On tour?! Where to? What am I doing?

Well ... it is just another boring oncologist meeting I have to attend. Okay boring is not the right word - the lectures are rather interesting ... but I am now sitting in the hotel room and I am bored to death.

It is so comfortable using the Internet then.

By the way, if you asked yourself what my "STRIKE" meant - I got the answer and Gregory now knows what the surprise was/is.

I might write about it later ...

Thursday, May 10, 2007

What is that blue thing Dr Wilson wears?

mood: funny

What a question, hm?

I mean ... what kind of blue thing is meant? I am wearing many blue things from time to time ;)

Blue boxers, blue pj's, blue socks, blue ties, blue shirts, blue trousers, blue sweaters ... and even dark blue leather shoes from time to time ...

So - dear reader - what did you mean?

If you can tell me what you meant - I might tell you the answer though!


Status report:



Sitting here in my office and staring at the walls I am ...

You might ask yourself - why?

The answer is simple and easy: I am waiting!

Did you ever have to wait ... I mean wait for something really important?

Seconds turn into minutes, minutes turn into hours, hours turn into days, days turn into weeks and weeks ... well, weeks turn into months or even decades!

Do you think that I overdraw?

If you should think so - you never had to wait for something really important.

Let me explain you a tiny bit (only a tiny because I don't want someone to know what I did though) ...

All has to do with a letter I wrote a few weeks ago. It was no business letter, it was not only normal letter ... no it was a love letter.

A love letter for Gregory, of course!!! (Don't dare thinking there might be anyone else in my life!) I already told you about this love letter though ...

This letter is connected with another little surprise and that I why I am waiting now. I wrote another letter to someone else - to who I will not tell now. This time the letter was no love letter at all ... but I am waiting desperately for the answer.

Checking my email accounts by and then, checking the mail box every evening when I am coming home ... or even waiting for a call.

I hate waiting! I really hate it! I am not a very patient person - I am trying to be, because sometimes it is just not in your hands. The recipient could be busy, the letter could have gone lost ... so many things could have occured.

I hate not knowing what is going on.

Why not just sending an acknowledgement? Informing the writer that the letter was received - is that too much to ask for?

Gregory is already getting suspicious and he will for sure ask me now what is going on - I am aware that he will read this entry and I so hope that I will have my answer today as I told the recipient I need it by today ...

Cross fingers for me ... it is sooooo important for me and I just dont want to spoil the surprise though.

Therefore ...

Gregory! Don't dare asking me all the time now what I did send and for what I am waiting! I am as silent as a grave ...

Tuesday, May 08, 2007

Gorgeous piece ...

of art I got sent by a friend on DA!

Sorry - I had to downsize it a bit, because the original is huuuuuuge!
You can see her art here: http://imagination22.deviantart.com/
Go and check it out!
Thank you so much for that great piece of art - Emi!

Monday, May 07, 2007

Family part I

mood: relieved

music: Wood Hall Four ~ habitual loafers of necessity

Family ... Etymology: Middle English familie, from Latin familia household (including servants as well as kin of the householder), from famulus servant

What is the definition of a family? In fact there are many definitions for that word ... but the most common one we use is: a group of persons of common ancestry.

Of course, we could sometimes use: a group of related plants or animals forming a category ranking above a genus and below an order and usually comprising several to many genera or a unit of a crime syndicate (as the Mafia) operating within a geographical area.

But lets stay with the first definition, right?

Why am I just giving you this information? Easy! I want you to know about which "family" I will write now.

To be exact I should use the plural form as I will write about two families in fact.

Greg's - i.e. Mr. and Mrs. House and my family (I will not write down every single family member!)

We had visitors over the weekend as you might already know or as you might remember.

I like my family, please don't get it wrong though - however, they live in Canada and one part in sunny California (all the other in Europe not to mention) and that is pretty good I think. Just seeing them from time to time - that is great!

Family is a great thing ... but not when you wanted to be alone and enjoying a lovely weekend. Not if your sister and her husband are having martial problems and for sure not when your brother in law celebrates his birthday!

Rachel's husband - Simon (or like Greg calls him: butthead) had his 4oth birthday this weekend and the family thought it might be nice to come to visit us instead of us having to fly up to Canada.

Family arrived here in Plainsboro on Friday in the afternoon - thanks godness we had to work late! Or ... well pretended that we had to work late though.

As they did rent a house for the weekend we hadn't to be at home though ...

We enjoyed our Friday evening home alone and just with some candles lit - I might write about it later though.

Back to the topic - back to the family!

My mom asked us (me) to go shopping with them, as they aren't familiar here. Believe me Gregory was more than happy to hear that! He was so happy - he didn't speak to me for more than an hour on Friday morning when I confessed it to him.

Yes - family can get you into trouble!

As promised we arrived at the rented house Saturday morning at 9 a.m.

Blythe opened the door ...

"Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarling!" she cried out and embraced Gregory.
He did squirm a bit and looked at me with a face like: Get me outta here!
I just smirked and gave a shrug.

The turn was mine then and after that huuuuuge embrace we were pulled in the house and greeted with several: "Look at you!", "DEAR!", "Jim!", "Greg" ... and some pats on the back and "son".

Those pats were okay though ... but all those hugs and kisses and everything - geez!
Three women can feel like an army - believe it or not! Our mothers are like that and my sister is the very same! The very same ...

To our surprise the men did not want to go shopping (what a surprise, huh?) and so it was up to us going with the women.

Gregory looked at me like a puppy dog when Nathan told him that they will not join the chicken party ...
"No way, Greg!" I hissed in his ear.
"You can't do that to me and let me go alone with them!" I whispered and with a secret gesture I pointed at my mom, who was standing in the kitchen and talking to Blythe.

"Jim, you are the cook! You know where to find all those things - they - want!" he whispered back and his eyes became like little stars and his mouth a pout.
"Stop it, Gregory!" I muttered and nudge his shoulder.
"My leg hurts!" he replied and leaned heavy on the cane.

"Aha! Suddenly it hurts that much that you can't walk, hm?" I shot back and narrowed my eyes.
"No, it did hurt all the time. But - fine!" he shrugged "FINE! Let's go then and you will have to explain them why I need so much Vicodin."

I couldn't avoid rolling my eyes up to the ceiling and the sigh I heard was mine when it slipped out of my mouth!
"Okaaay ... stay here then! Next time you tell me immediately that your leg hurts!" I said and gave him an enquiring look.
Gregory just nodded and walked into the living room.
I heard him saying something to Sean and next time I checked what he was doing ... he was playing a video game with Sean.

Right ... it was me and the three ladies going shopping then!

Family can really be fun!

(part 2 following soon - stay tuned!)

Sunday, May 06, 2007

Sonnet 81 ~ Shakespeare

Or I shall live your epitaph to make,
Or you survive when I in earth am rotten;
From hence your memory death cannot take,
Although in me each part will be forgottten.
Your name from hence immortal life shall have,
Though I, once gone, to all the world must die;
The earth can yield me but a common grave,
When you entombed in men's eyes shall lie.
Your monument shall be my gentle verse,
Which eyes not yet created shall o'er-read;
And tongues to be your being shall rehearse,
When all the breathers of this world are dead.
You still shall live, such virtue hath my pen,
Where breath most breathes, even in the mouths of men.

I love it ... enjoy!

Saturday, May 05, 2007


Gregory got it right ...

Mothers can be a pain in the ass sometimes when it comes up to embarassing stories or photos...

Our mothers talked about so many embarassing stories that made Greg and me blush from time to time - well, the women had their fun.

Here is one old pic my Mom showed Blythe:

Yes ... me ...

You can see how I liked it!

One of those old shots - and I will see ... probably there will be some more coming.

Visitors and finding an old pic

Well, our visitors - Greg has already written about it - are here within a minute.

So looking forward to it we both are (please note the sarcasm) ... just cleaned the flat a bit and while removing some old photography books a loose pic fell out ...

Gregory looked at it and grinned.

"Holy, James! That one I know!"

"Huh?" I asked him and looked puzzled.

He waved at me with a picture in his hand and I approached him.

"What do you have here?"

"You!" he said with a broad grin upon his face and showed me the pic.

"Geez!" I muttered and blushed slightly.

"I know when this pic was made" Greg said with a smile.

"Sure you know it, it was you who made it several years ago" I replied and stared at the picture.

"Mhm, on that very congress we first met" Gregory whispered into my ear.

I just nodded and we both looked at the photography.
And here it is:

This photo was made by Gregory on the first day we met ... several years ago as you can see.
The door bell just rang ... have to go for now!

Wednesday, May 02, 2007


mood: more than amused

Just followed some links to our blogs and found some cute little comments ...

Do you believe every single word we are writing here? Readers?

Do you really believe everything?

I mean ... me buying some fairy lights etc. - we are not always telling the truth about our life.

Would it be of interest boring you with normal cases and with the all around bustle at work?

Not really if you are honest!

We are just telling you the truth most of the time ... but sometimes let us enjoy the fact of writing and playing pranks a bit.

Some person we know might have bought or done those things ... but we wont tell you who though ...

Believe us - we are not that nice ...

I am not that nice all the time - but ... that is for sure, we are no teenage girls and you should know that, right?

By the way, we are laughing our asses off at the moment and that is just true. Sober ... ehm ... is a thing far far away from where we are now.

Have fun and always think about the importance of being earnest!

It is sometimes just wise to be funny as well...



Tuesday, May 01, 2007

Guinness ...

and the consequences when you don't stop drinking...

Yes, I have to admit that I am slightly drunk while writing this entry - okay, Greg and I are both slightly drunk.

A bit too many pints though - so should you find any errors and mistakes - keep them! I might change the entry a bit when I am sober again.

Just wanted to babble a bit ... - Greg said I would tell you about what we just did - he should know me better by now.

What did we you are asking yourself?

Are you mature? Are you able to breathe slowly while reading some erotic stuff? Are you a heart attack risk patient?

Should you be a risk patient for any kind of attacks - just stop reading now! If you are mature ... and wanting to have some distraction - continue! Don't blame me though - it was a bet (again) and I told you we are far away from being sober!

I should tell you perhaps that we had a bit of a conversation after Foreman left our apartment this evening. He just did come by for a talk and a beer - some misunderstandings happened while Foreman was here and so we talked about that when he just left us some hours ago.

You are probably not interested about the reason of our little discussion, are you?
Hmmm... I guess you are - why would you read this blog though?

Okay - let me just tell you that it was jealousy again ... Greg was jealous because I had a phone call (he did not know that I was talking with my sister!) - he acted slightly stupid then and that caused me to react stupid as well.

"You should have told me that you were talking with Rachel, Jim!"
I shrugged and opened two bottles of Guinness.
"You could have asked me!" I answered and handed him one bottle.
"I could have done that, right" he muttered and took a sip.

I leaned back into the cushions and gazed at him.
Believe me - I will not tell you my thoughts when I recognized how sexy he looked in that new shirt.
He must have noticed my look though and raised an eyebrow.
"Come here, James!" he spoke silently.
He pointed to his feet "You ... come here!"

I frowned but arose and approached him.
My hands in my pockets I stood before him and looked down.
Gregory grabbed my belt and drew me down on his lab.
"I want you" he moaned and started to unbotton my shirt.
"Pardon?" I asked him and leaned back slightly.
"You are not deaf!" he grunted and pulled the shirt over my head.
"Now!" Gregory muttered through gritted teeth and kissed my chest with hot and wet kisses.

A sigh slipped out of my mouth and my tongue moistured my lips.
Greg's tongue tip circled around my nipples and his left hand unbuckled my belt.
Slightly panting now I opened the upper buttons of his shirt and removed it then together with the t-shirt he was wearing underneath.
"Greg" I sighed when his fingers played with the fabric of my boxers.

"Down" he whispered and pushed me off his lab.
We both sank down to the ground andGreg then removed my trousers and my boxers with one fast movement.
Gregory eyeballed me and a warm smile appeared on his face.
"Oh Jim, you are driving me crazy!" he moaned silently and with his knee he parted my legs.

I watched him removing his own trousers and enjoyed the every move he made and every inch of his skin that was revealed.
My look was caputed by his delicate part and I gestured him to come closer ...

Gregory shook his head, "No, not pleasing now ... I just want you like that ..." and with these words he showed me what he meant.
A loud moan filled the air - and it took me a while to realize that it was me moaning his name.

He made me feeling oh so weak and I nearly had a heart attack.
"I am all yours" I sighed and moaned and muttered several times.
"Yes ... you ... are ...mine..." he replied and we both tried to catch breath again.

Fingers caressing my chest, finger nails scrathing over his back, clutching his bum ...
Deeper ...quicker ... and higher he took us both - and our dance of lust just errupted in a firework after a long long time.

... ... ...

Guinness can cause a lot - and perhaps it is a kind of unknown aphrodisiac as well?! Who knows that ...

I hope I won my bet now ... and I hope no one with a weak heart read that!

Enjoyed the weather ...

mood: relaxed

music: Sarah McLachlan ~ Touch

We spent the weekend in Point Pleasant again ... it was wonderful

The weather was excellent - and I might tell you about it later.

Just stopping by for a second - have a lot to do at the moment ...

So - just take care!

And here is something for you:

The Lake Isle of Innisfree
I WILL arise and go now, and go to Innisfree,
And a small cabin build there, of clay and wattles made;
Nine bean rows will I have there, a hive for the honey bee,
And live alone in the bee-loud glade.

And I shall have some peace there, for peace comes dropping slow,
Dropping from the veils of the morning to where the cricket sings;
There midnight's all a glimmer, and noon a purple glow,
And evening full of the linnet's wings.

I will arise and go now, for always night and day
I hear lake water lapping with low sounds by the shore;
While I stand on the roadway, or on the pavements gray,
I hear it in the deep heart's core.

W.B. Yeats (for sure)