mood: jealous and anxious
music: Billy Talent - Red flag
Valentine's day ... yes normally I would have bought red roses and thought about spending a more then pleasant day with Gregory but now I am unsure.
What happened you might ask yourself. Yes - this is a very good question.
I did amass Gregory yesterday and he slept in while doing so. Okay, that is no problem for me, he really needs some rest. But he is a bit different the last few days. Sitting in front of his computer and giggling so often and when I ask him what is so funny, he says that he just read some funny article.
Okay, I really believed him. I really did!
As you might probably know we are sometimes in the Internet (as you can see here). It is funny somehow and so anonymously - great! Really weird people out there though.
I am drifting apart, sorry for that. So what changed my mood?
Gregory fell asleep while I amassed his back slightly and after I placed the cover over him, I tiptoed my way out of the bedroom and went into the living room. It wasn't actually that late so I decided to switch on the computer again.
I wanted to check DeviantArt a bit and so I did. There I found an interesting conversation Gregory had with a so-called "Jimmy". Very interesting conversation though! They were actually flirting!!!
I sat there, gnawed on my lower lip, rubbed my neck and drank a Guinness.
They referred to another kind of internet platform, that was unknown for me. So I went there, made an account and found Greg there as well. I found him "talking" to that "Jimmy" - if you still can call it talking though.
I felt sick, my stomach turned and my heart beat increased. Yes, I am a jealous person, I really don't deny that! You would have been jealous as well, seeing that converstation.
So I went to bed, stayed on my side and tried to sleep. After having a really damn nightmare I stood up at about 5 am, got dressed and went to the PPTH. I told you I have a lot of work to be done currently.
It was at about 9 am, Greg came in.
He stumbled into my offcie, "You told me you were her...NOW..." he said with a grin upon his face. Yes, right I did write him a message before.
I looked up from my file and waved at him. "Come here for a moment."
Gregory raised an eyebrow and waved back "You wave at me? Um..." He looked a bit puzzled and approached my desk. "Okay...I'm here. For a moment?"
I handed him a file "Here check this out, please. We are having problems with this case. Woman, 37 years old, testings are negative but her symptoms are a bit unusual."
He looked down at the file and glanced up to me "That's all? And that's why you left before I got up?" Greg looked back to the file again "Hm... Okay. By the way, good morning, nice to see you and I love you, too."
(Loving me, too...)
I raised an eyebrow and replied with a slightest of a smile "Sorry but I do have pretty much work and I didn't want to disturb you in your sleep."
Gregory gave me a critical look "Uhuuu... There was only one...no...there were two times since we are together you did not 'disturb me in my sleep' when you wanted to get up and leave early. First: When you fled to Canada. Second: When I put your hand into that bowl of water. "
"Then this is the third one, right?" I said, stood up and poured me some coffee. "You had coffee already?" I asked and waved slightly with another mug.
"I... No...not yet. Yes...it's the third one. Would you please explain to me what I did?" he said and leaned hard on the cane.
I handed him my cup and poured another one for me "What you did? Nothing, nothing ..." I said while turning and sitting on my chair again.
Greg stared at me "Nothing...right... " he said and shook his head slightly "Did anyone annoy you? Did you receive a daft text message this morning? Did your parents call? Oh...and may I sit down or do you want me to leave now?"
"Sure you can stay." I said, rubbed my neck and leaned back. "No one called, no text message though." I replied and looked him in the eyes. I wanted to be sure if there could anything be seen in there. Any sign ...
Gregory looked back and I noticed that he felt uneasy somehow " Well... " he said and sipped at his coffee "Sounds like a perfectly normal start into the day. Would you now bother to say good morning to me?"
"Good morning" I said, sipped at my coffee as well and tried to put a smile on my face. (He felt uneasy!!)
Gregory looked at me with his analyzing glance "And a happy valentine's day..." he then said and smiled back.
"Oh right, it is Valentine's day" I nodded slightly and sipped again. "Happy one to you as well."
He frowned "Hey, how awkward is that, huh? You are pissed off, this is no normal behavior! Or did you change to House and I didn't notice?"
I opened a new file and sighed "No I am still Wilson."
Gregory gazed at me with a somehow baffled look "Okay....fine." He replied and looked out of the window "What do you think of having dinner tonight at a good seafood restaurant?" He asked me and my heart made a little jump.
"I have loads of paperwork to do, so I can't say when I will be out of here." I replied with a deep sigh and I know I must have looked a bit uncomfortably.
Gregory looked blanked "Paperwork... And this paperwork is so important it is going to keep you here until 9 pm?"
"I do have clinic duty and patients as well" I said and pointed at the file on the desk. "You know how this is" I answered with a sigh.
"I know how this is. Sure. But... C'mon, you can't fool me. Just one look at you tells me you just don't want to. Just tell me and I won't feel as crappy as I now do when you pretend not to have the time. I'll better go now, hm? Maybe you'll be finished earlier then. "
"Just ask me again later in the lunch break. I might know it by then." I replied and nodded.
He looked into my eyes and my heart made another jump. "Okay. I'll do that. May I have another coffee or do you want me to go now?"
"Sure you can have another cup of coffee" I said and pointed at the coffee machine.
"Awfully nice." He said and poured another coffee for himself "What about you?"
I shook my head "No, thanks. I already had enough in the last few hours." My hands flipped through the file and I asked myself, if I should just ask him about that "Jimmy".
"Hum?" Greg said and turned to me with a raised eyebrow. "That Jimmy? You want to ask me about yourself?" He narrowed his eyes and sat down again "Are you sure you feel well?"
Gawd, did I really say that aloud? I thought and replied "What Jimmy?"
"Dunno? You mumbled something into your non-existing beard." Greg said, popped a pill and sipped some coffee.
"Fine, fine" I said, sighed and looked at him. "I found your little conversation with that "Jimmy" on DA and well I noticed you referred to some other platform as well. So I just went to look. Fuck it, Greg! You are flirting with him!" I stood up and walked to the window, staring out in the February rain.
"I am talking to a man with your name and your picture." I heard Greg saying but didn't turn around yet. " If that's one of your illminded pranks, okay...But don't act pissy pique now, please. "
These words actually made me turn around. "Ill-minded pranks? Are you insane or what?" I asked him in rage. "That, that guy is hitting on you" I pointed at the computer "I don't know why he has the same name like I do have or where the heck from he has a picture of me. This is not funny! And I am really not amused, Gregory."
I turned around again and supported my hands on the balcony door "You know, this did hurt. This really did hurt. You better tell me if there is anything going on or you go and think about it and we talk later."
There was no sound from Gregory so I turned around again, leaned at the balcony door and looked at him. "Are you speechless now?" I asked him and Greg just looked at me with his mouth slightly opened.
"Going on? 'That' guy? Heck, that guy is you! Stop it! It's not funny if it was supposed to be. You should calm down and think about your behavior!" he said angrily, turned and slammed the door behind him.
Fine ... still no clue by now. I really have to think about it a bit and I hope he will tell me the truth.